Flying Without a Net

I'm overwhelmed by the kindness of all of you. I posted an embarrassing and humbling story last week and I don't even have words for the love I got back to me.  Thank you.  I got stories back about so many of you going through something similar and it was touching and so wonderful to talk to other people who knew exactly what I was going through. It was a lot of great conversations about body image, our own worth and what we do to ourselves. 

In talking about this with a friend we discussed removing food as a source of comfort. Once you do that then what? I told her that I was flying without a net, I didn't have any idea of how to comfort myself.  I didn't know how to make any of the bad feelings go away.  Exercise doesn't work yet, sleep (while lovely) eventually ends and I've put food off limits.  There goes all the self comfort that I know.  So I am ignoring it for now, pretending that everything is ok and that I'm happy and that I'm not constantly thinking of how to get my hands on donuts or ice cream.  Mostly I'm thinking about how I can be stronger than the thought that pops into my head that Winchell's is 24 hours and I have cash.

Eventually I have faith, I hope that I can learn new skills to cope. Or maybe, just maybe actually feel a feeling instead of trying to make it go away.  But if I'm flying without a net, I need to make small movements-self preservation always wins.